Saturday, November 19, 2005
But really, aren't we another year older every day?
It's been a rough few weeks for Telly. In truth, it's probably been a rough year, but I didn't see that. Or at least, I didn't really see it. I was an only child, my parents were older and I never really connected with them. On some level, I wonder if maybe I just don't get the whole close-knit family thing.
Yesterday was Michelle's birthday. Twenty-seven years on this chassis, although I think I look a bit younger. Of my three birthdays, it's the one that means the least to me. I'm fairly healthy, so the amount of wear and tear on this body isn't frequently on my mind. I'm thirty-one or two, depending on the context, but I'm only in my mid-twenties when I'm trying to make an impression. And I don't have any attachment to that date, no big events or chocolate cake or presents or lifetime spent writing it in forms.
But it means something to Telly. He's had cake and ice cream that day every year all his life. And now, after spending the last year slowly getting more and more freaked out by his sister not acting like she should, he discovers all this. And where he'd been worried before, now he's whatever comes two steps after that. I mean, before, he may have thought I was acting strangely, but I was doing okay; I had a decent job, was putting food on the table, had good friends, and wasn't going with someone who was abusive or didn't respect me. He could look at that and even if how I was living my life didn't make any sense to him, it seemed to be working. Now, he looks and sees I'm just his sister on the outside - well, mostly - and the part that remembers him and must love him is halfway around the world, in some other body with who knows what going down for the past two years.
He came by the apartment last night, with a birthday present. Not much, a little necklace with a frog-shaped charm on it. Kind of cute. Michelle liked frogs, he said. Not for the whole enchanted prince deal, but for the starting out as one thing but outgrowing it, for being cute when they jump. It was her thing. He bought it a month ago, figuring that maybe if he gave it to me, I'd acknowledge... I don't know, that I was still his sister and stop playing around.
It's cute. I'm not a jewlery person, but I wouldn't mind wearing it on a day when I had to dress up a bit. And it's thoughtful. I feel like a complete heel for not being the person who would really love it and have it mean something to me. So I had him wrap it back up, and told him that I was sure Agent Jones and his team would find Michelle really soon, and then he could give it to her. Or him, as the case might be.
Then we drank. Probably not the most sensible course of action, but it was one of those situations where there weren't many better options. He slept on the couch. Still is, actually.
We really need to find his sister.
So, it's about to be turkey day. Big family holiday. What's the turkey day plan? (And the double feature special at the local movie house doesn't cut it, no matter how cool a japanase art film special they are running)I can't but think this is a tough sort of day for you...
Hey, the Brattle has Casablanca for Thanksgiving. And it's FOR CHARITY, to help save said art house. Isn't that good enough?
Well, it's a good cause, don't get me wrong, but isn't there somewhere you ought to be eating turkey? You haven't talked much about your "remembered" (That sound right) Mom of late, and I'm sure Telly's doing *something* for the holiday. Not to mention Natalie, who's got a bit of your history, if not your current genetics in tow. Just asking...Post a Comment