Transplanted Life
Monday, October 27, 2003
Have I mentioned I hate this costume crap?
Of course, it doesn't help that the first place that came up when I looked for costume shops in the area was a place called "Hubba Hubba". As tempting as the idea of giving Michelle a really bad reputation can sound when I'm at my most pissed off, some of the stuff they had in there looked beyond uncomfortable, like it might actually cause injury or at least bruising and blisters. And the prices people evidently pay to look scuzzy... Gads.

I get no sympathy about this from my friends and co-workers, of course. Mark suggested I dress up as a "sexy secretary". Carter was with him and asked how that would be any different from my everyday clothing (more on that later), and Mark says "no underwear". There has got to be a harassment statute that covers that.

And my female friends, who are usually all "oh, I can't help you shop for underwear because I'd feel so inadequate" are emailing me stuff like this and this ("Pilgrim Patty", specifically) and don't get this because Jen's wearing it... It's madness. Even Kate's getting into it.

I'm half tempted to go down to the mall, buy a simple Red Sox T-shirt, a pair of men's jeans that come close to fitting this body and putting on a nametag that says "Hello, My Name is Martin Hartle" and just spending the day not pretending to be someone else.

Oh, and that whole "sexy secretary" thing. Weird. I honestly stopped and thought about how I should react. On the one hand, I sort of resented the implication that I was primarily sexy, like I was in the office mostly as some kind of ornament. Sure, maybe that's what Michelle was, but I know I'm more than that. On the other hand, I do spend time on my appearance, and occasionally wonder if I'm doing it right, so it's kind of an accomplishment. That "no underwear" bit was more than a bit crude, though. And Carter just off-hand saying I'm sexy every day... I just don't know what to think. He's single, I'm single, was that supposed to be sending some kind of signal? I like the guy to talk to, and looking at him objectively I see he's good-looking. If I'm honest he'd probably be as much fun to date as Kurt was - more, since I wouldn't have to watch myself to avoid showing how well I already know him. And, forgive me, but I have found myself feeling a bit horny the past couple of days...

Gah! Just the idea of letting someone else inside this body like that again is creepy. Just because I enjoyed sleeping with Kurt doesn't mean I like what it represents, and I'd still be lying to Carter, and where do I get off thinking he's even interested? I know I've made comments like that completely innocently before, when I was the guy.

I hate Halloween.

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