Thursday, August 14, 2003
Arrgh. No west-coast game tonight, but apparently three nights of watching TV until one have messed with my rhythms. Or Michelle's rhythms. Whatever. Anyway, I'm not close to tired despite having to work tomorrow.
So, while trying to get tired, I've been surfing the web, and I hit some message boards that I'm a member of, as "Martin Hartle". I haven't been reading them much lately, in part out of self-pity - who cares about talking movies, comics, TV and baseball when you've had your mind stuck into the body some woman you've only met once and told that you've got to try and date your best friend without telling him or anyone you know the truth? But I'm bored and while it's tempting to get a six-pack and knock myself out that way, I don't know what Michelle's tolerance is and what if I get drunk enough that calling Kurt and telling him everything sounds like a really good idea? Or even worse, calling my mother and telling her everything? Eats you up inside, it does (like Yoda talk it too you makes). But, anyway, I had some time to kill and started checking those boards out.
The big thing I noticed - no posts from Martin Hartle in a month. None. I'm going to choose to look at it as a good thing - that it means the letter from Michelle is probably at least close to the truth - she's in my body, and isn't terribly interested in continuing my life, so she's not posting on message boards as me. It's a stretch, but more of one than if the conspiracy theory is correct, and there's another Martin in my body, and he just stopped posting for some reason I can't guess. It's not impossible - I stopped posting, obviously, and for all I know this hypothetical other Martin has met a girl who occupies all his time. But it's less likely.
Anyway, I pondered just jumping back in, especially on the comic board where I use an alias, but better not to risk it - what if Michelle decides to make my presence known again? Or if somebody wonders why my private email address is now email@example.com? Or why I have nothing to say about Seattle?
It sucks. For all that people say no-one knows who you are on-line, you still have to change what you do because of your real life.
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